Approaching Your Spouse for the Divorce Talk

If you’ve made the decision to file for divorce, one of the most important steps you’ll have to take is breaking the news to your spouse. For many people, this will be one of the hardest things they will ever do in their entire lives. It’s a big moment, and you want to make sure you approach it as best as possible. After all, this conversation could set the tone for the entire divorce.

With that in mind, here are a few key tips to follow when approaching your spouse for the divorce talk:

  • Figure out the time and place—The first thing you need to do is determine when and where you’ll tell your spouse that you want to end your marriage. Ideally, your spouse should be the first person to hear this news, because if you tell your friends first, word could get around and your spouse might not even hear the news from you. Once you’ve made the decision to get divorced and gotten your affairs in order, figure out a time to have a private talk with your spouse as soon as possible.
  • Timing matters—You probably don’t want to talk to your spouse about your decision to get a divorce after he or she has had a long, stressful day. On the other hand, you don’t want to ruin a nice occasion, like a holiday with such news either. Find a stress-free, calm time to have this discussion in private.
  • Be kind and caring—No matter how angry you might be with your spouse, your approach to breaking this news to them needs to be as kind as possible. Remember, this is setting the tone for your whole divorce process, so you need to keep things as civil as possible.

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